We all know that "blood is thicker than water," and that "your mother will always love you no matter what you do." It's been drilled into us since infancy, and it's generally true in life. Sometimes, however, I am still amazed by how deep people will sink into denial to maintain their loyalty to family.
Exhibit A today is the case of Diane Schuler, the woman who drove her vehicle the wrong way on New York's Taconic Parkway until she killed herself and seven other people. Tests have shown that she was heavily inebriated at the time and had used marijuana. Such tests are quite reliable these days, and as the linked article points out, there have been many known cases in which alcoholics have successfully hidden their secret from their families and best friends for years. Notwithstanding all that, family members seem unable to come to terms with the facts, and insist that Mrs. Schuler was not a drinker and could not have been drunk. They're looking for some other explanation.
Exhibit B is the "Norfolk Four," four sailors who were convicted in 1997 of rape and murder. It was one of those situations in which they confessed under police pressure, but quickly withdrew their confessions, and there was no forensic evidence to prove them guilty. Years later, someone else confessed to the crime; his confession was supported by DNA evidence, and he has in turn been convicted and is serving his sentence but incredibly, three of the Norfolk Four were still incarcerated in 2009. It seems that in deciding now to pardon the three and release them (though not to reverse their conviction), Virginia Governor Tim Kaine has made an appropriate and overdue decision. The victim's mother, however, is prepared to overlook the fact that someone else committed the crime, and criticizes Kaine's decision because "there is no new evidence" or information to support it.
I suppose this kind of fierce loyalty, to and past the point of denial, originates deep in our psyches and may even serve some survival-of-the-species imperative. But it does little good, and can be damaging to others (even the loyal parent or relative) if its object is no longer living.


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